love part 1

This is something i have had on my mind for a while now. If someone asks me if i still love Joanna, I say yes. When people ask me if i am over Joanna, I say yes. I am. I also say I got over her when i climbed a mountain in a storm. Now, what people think this means is: faced with the beauty and power of nature at its highest intensity, I realized that me, and Joanna and my love for her and our relationship are nothing in comparison. They are dead wrong. I love Joanna. (I will get to what i think that means in a few moments) On the top of that mountain i did not think of Joanna at all. I did not think of anything but the experience of being there. 

Once i had climbed down and was back in the city i took a look at the photographs i had taken of the mountain. After i got to the end of those pictures i saw that there were other pictures on the camera. Some of these other pictures were of me and Joanna. As i looked at these pictures still buzzing with the mountain high i realized something: They are not comparable (this is actually a topology metaphor). I love Joanna.  Nothing i do will change that. nor should anything i do change that. i love her. And i love that mountain. she does not love me, and that is that. I can not be with her or love her in the action sense of the word. but that changes nothing. Just as me no longer being on that mountain changes nothing about the fact that i love that mountain. And just like that, i was at peace with it. and that is what i mean when i say i am over her. i am at peace with the knowledge that i love her and she does not love me.

I have some more to say but i should be heading to class. maybe i will make a part 2 next time i post.